The year is 1941. Most landscapes in pre-independence Malaya are expansive. The paddy fields seem just as infinite as the seas that reach to the ends of the horizon. Living in the secluded villages of Kedah is a middle-aged man named Hadi. Like the rest of the village people, Hadi is Malay, and works out on the farm.
“The thing about Alzheimer’s is that it’s sort of like all these little, small deaths along the way before they physically die.” -Lucinda Williams
Blank. It’s completely empty, washed anew like a white slate of stone. I wonder if stones are even white. I wish I could remember more. I desperately yearn to know the person I used to be.
I don’t know what time it is, but it’s late at night. The both of us are perched on the rooftop, sharing a cigarette. I watch my younger self inhale and choke on the smoke. She clearly grimaces and hands it back to me. I inhale deeply, biding my time. The edge of the cigarette crackles as I slowly exhale into the cold, night air.
It was the last school recital night of the year; students, teachers and parents filed into the dark auditorium, eager to watch the show. Unbeknownst to them, it would probably be the worst one yet. As the lights dimmed around them, the curtains pulled back to reveal a magician and his assistant, the pair caught in a loud argument over a lost bearded dragon. It took them minutes to realise everyone had been waiting for them to perform. Quite literally, they were two deers caught in the headlights.
The pale skinny boy in the photo looked foreign; dark curls, hard brown eyes, features etched into what seemed to be a permanent frown. Max sneaked a glance at the vanity mirror facing him; same physical traits and yet an entirely different person.
