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Content warning: cyberbullying, abuse mentioned, implied suicide, teacher-student relationship mentioned
Harper
She hadn’t meant to take it that far.
The pain was just too much to bear – the words of her friend repeating themselves in her head as if they were coming from a broken record player, ringing in her ears until she had to resist the urge to scream.
Somewhere in the wake of her hurt, anger manifested, clouding her thoughts and judgement. All she wanted at that moment was to end her suffering.
Return it somehow.
Staring at her blank phone screen, she awaited the feeling of relief that would set in from fulfilling her desires.
It never came.
As her phone turned on, a rampage of notifications flooding in from her newest post, only the feeling of guilt arrived.
A Few Hours Ago
The school hallway buzzed with a familiar rush of students as everyone attempted to get to their classes before the afternoon bell rang. Despite the bustling atmosphere, Harper couldn’t bring herself to pay attention to anything around her. Not when her mind was occupied by the scene that had just played out in the cafeteria, the initiator walking just a few metres in front of her, oblivious to her turmoil.
She should have kept quiet about it – let it slide. There was no need to start a fire over something that most would deem as insignificant.
But her discomfort was beginning to become unbearable.
“Why did you have to say it like that?”
Harper’s voice was far more accusatory than she had intended for it to be. She’d meant for it to come out casually, as if she was merely enquiring about a minor inconvenience. But as she spoke, she found herself sounding far too loud.
Too hurt.
Catching her attention, Ava stopped walking and looked back at her, confused. “What do you mean?”
“The way you talked to Alice just now,” Harper replied, trying to steady her tone. “When she asked if we were free this weekend. You didn’t have to answer for me like that.”
“Huh?” Ava seemed to ponder for a moment before realisation dawned on her. “Oh, you mean when she was asking our help for her art project? You’re free for that, aren’t you?”
“I am!” Harper’s sudden outburst startled Ava. “But you didn’t have to say… you didn’t have to make it out like I don’t have a life!”
She could feel her face heat up, fist clenching in embarrassment as she recalled the moment.
The way Ava responded to Alice, mocking Harper.
“You don’t have to ask. She’s always free.”
The weird look Alice gave her as she forced a giggle. Harper wondered what she thought of her right then? Did she look pitiful?
Yes, she was always free – she didn’t have a lot of things going on for her.
But it wasn’t by choice. And Ava knew that better than anyone.
An awkward silence stretched out between them, only broken by the sounds of students chattering as they walked by. After a while, Harper was beginning to feel guilty for her tantrum.
“Sorr-”
“What are you so upset about?” The blunt question striked her somewhere deep in her chest. Meeting Ava’s eyes, Harper felt herself go numb under her annoyed gaze. “It’s true isn’t it?”
When Harper remained silent, Ava couldn’t help but let out a frustrated sigh. “You’re always cooped up in your own little shell that you don’t go out and participate in anything or keep yourself busy. If I hadn’t said you were free, you weren’t going to offer to help Alice, right?”
“What does that have to do with you!” Harper yelled, angered by the assumption.
“Hey!” She retorted, matching her hostility. Ava always had a sensitive temper, but it was the first time she had lashed out at Harper. “I was just looking out for you, okay? You always complain about how you want to do more and be better, but you never actually do anything to achieve that. Well, here’s your chance!”
“But it’s not what I want! I don’t feel comfortable helping her with that!”
“What are you even comfortable doing?”
The question seemed to hit somewhere sensitive as Harper abruptly fell quiet, expression pinched. Ava knew she had hurt her. That would have been a good enough reason to stop and apologise.
But she couldn’t find it in herself to do that. She had started a fire and was now letting it burn.
“You know what I realised?” The rhetorical question came out sharp. “You keep saying that it’s your family situation that is holding you back from doing what you want. But the truth is, it’s yourself.”
Harper flinched.
“You’re too weak to step out of your comfort zone, too stubborn to reach out for help, and too shy to look for opportunities. And whenever anybody offers you a chance, you just shirk away from it.”
“I-”
“You keep blaming others for where you are but you should try looking at yourself for a change. You’re the problem here.”
You’re the problem-
The moments after that was a blur – all Harper remembered was shoving Ava aside as she ran out of the school. It didn’t matter that she had classes to attend. All she wanted to do was get out of there.
But the truth was, she didn’t know if she was running away from Ava or her words.
A Few Hours Later
Ava
She had taken it too far – igniting a fire that burned through a delicate friendship.
And she realised it too late.
As her call turned to a voice message notification for the ninth time, she knew she had to do more than apologise to fix things between them.
God, why did my temper have to be so bad…
Sighing, she threw her phone to the side. As she laid on her bed, recalling the incident, her anger reignited.
But what do I even have to apologise for?
Everything she said – to her at least – was nothing but the truth.
You’re the problem.
Ava flinched at the memory.
She was the only person Harper ever told about her family issues to – how abusive her father was and how her mother didn’t have what it took to leave the relationship. It spilled over to their children, where Harper had to always be careful about causing inconveniences to her parents in hopes of not triggering unnecessary outrages. She rarely participated in anything because of that.
Thinking it over, she had crossed the line.
I need to fix this.
Picking up her phone, she was going to dial Harper’s number again but stopped at the flurry of messages that were filling her home screen – they ranged from friends to classmates she rarely talked to.
The top message made her heart sink.
Ava. What the hell is this?
Harper
A week had passed since their conflict and Ava hadn’t been attending school.
And Harper knew why.
After a few minutes of releasing the post, she had immediately taken it down. But by then, people had already saved and shared it across multiple platforms, even school group chats, where it was met with a flurry of hate comments directed at her friend.
No, no, no…
Desperate, Harper tried contacting Ava – calling and texting her everyday, even sneaking out of her house to look for her. But all her attempts had been in vain – Ava never responded and no one was home when she visited.
Then, a sudden school assembly was called. Whispers erupted among the row of students as the principal walked on stage, a grim expression on his face. There was an unanimous assumption that he was going to address the post about Ava – the school had yet to release a statement after all.
But Harper’s guts told her that it was going to be something far worse.
No… please no…
“Students,” The principal started with a solemn tone. “We are gathered here today as we have sad news to share. A student from Class B, Ava…”
Gasps filled the hall as the students absorbed the weight of the principal’s news. Some even began to whisper to each other, discussing the ordeal.
Throughout the commotion, one person remained silent, fist clenched so tightly that her fingernails dug into her palms, blood seeping out of the wound.
No… why…
Tears streamed down Harper’s face.
A part of her knew of this outcome. After days of no contact, something inside of her just… knew.
She had taken it too far – fought fire with fire, until there was an explosion that destroyed something she hadn’t known was precious to her.
And there was no way for her to undo any of it.
New Post!
Ava from High Value Academy isn’t as perfect as she seems. She’s dating the current science teacher of Class C – the very person who got her enrolled in the school.
Written By: Liaw Zi Yi
